"make me calm"

soooo, i am not a very good wait-er... as in, i don't wait well. i like to plan stuff...and when you DON'T KNOW what is going to happen or HOW THINGS WILL turn out, well, that really makes planning pretty freaking difficult. which means you just have to WAIT to see how things unfold, and that brings me back to that whole I AM NOT A GOOD WAIT-ER thing. sigh

today's title comes from a woman my mama friend patsy used to work with. she was in a group home, and i want to say she had down's syndrome or something. anyway, the woman also had anxiety issues and took a drug called buspar. whenever she'd get agitated, patsy would ask her if she'd taken her buspar. the woman would say something like, "yeah and buspar make me calm"...only patsy did her voice so well it would almost make me pee my pants. the moral of the story is, i think i could use some buspar right now...

i get so worked up, i don't do anything...and that drives me crazy. i just keep telling myself if i can hold on for a few more weeks, life will not be so damned crazy....but i feel like this guy, the cliffhanger, on this show the kids watch..."can't.hold.on.much.LONGER...."

peace