my car ride today

here's the first song i heard that made my toes curl (this is an involuntary reaction caused by something some part of me responds to before i'm even aware of what's going on...usually it's music...sometimes it's sex...but these days, it's usually music...hehe)



and posting this makes me realize that my toe curling to this song is kind of hijacked, because usually about a minute into it, i remember that the song i really love by led zepplin is this one... (and i'm telling you, this hijacking has been occurring for probably almost twenty years)


which, oddly enough, makes me think of my best friend from high school, patsy. her partner is pregnant and they just found out yesterday they're expecting twins. now, this is definitely something that makes my toes curl and my eyes tear up, too. i don't know why my joy is so strong with this particular pregnancy...god knows i get excited about all of the pregnancies i get to hear about...but i am overjoyed for them. oh, the reason this is odd is because these are two songs patsy and i used to listen to over and over in the first years of our friendship.

i really am okay. reading about dependent arising kind of cracked things open for me...and the words are all scattered...hard to bring a few together and make a sentence to frame these huge concepts i keep zooming back to see, then zooming in to understand...but heh, when you zoom in and it's all still so new, you have no idea where you are in the whole of it all. i keep wondering if i can explain it in my own words at all. the idea that nothing exists independently...you cannot find a whole that exists independently of its parts...the whole is dependent on the parts and the parts on the whole. three methods...cause, parts, and thought...or something like that. tomorrow, i'll harvest some quotes and see if i can't make a dent in it.

oh, here's another one...the second song by jason mraz i've heard this week...i actually recognized it as his voice. which i think is remarkable since i'd only just heard him last week and had only heard that song twice...lucky that one was called.


peace