calm assertive energy

this is what cesar says we should always try to project with dogs. he does mention that calm submissive helps marriages work, but no one is married to their dog. well, at least not legally, but i suppose if it was consensual?...i don't know...that was not where i was headed...

calm assertive energy. this is the goal. again, i am just really turned on (for lack of a better word) by the way this book about DOGS talks about energy being the one true universal language. i think not being from america, maybe mr. millan just doesn't understand that this isn't something most americans consider..."what kind of energy am i projecting?" maybe "do these shoes match my belt?" or "should i get my teeth bleached?" but i didn't hear anyone talk about energy til i met my friend jeanni when i was 31. and it has opened a whole new realm for me...a whole new room in my attic to roam, so to speak. so i am quite taken by this book. (although my head pounded so badly last night that i only read about five pages before i fell asleep)

calm assertive energy. this is not the frantic defensive energy i've been swimming in for a few days. nope, that's not the same thing. and i hate being stuck in that. but maybe i'm just not a four wheel drive yet, and so when i hit something like that, i get stuck. and spin my wheels for fucking ever, unable to get out. until someone hands me a damn board, and the one i got last night said "CALM ASSERTIVE ENERGY". (noticing a theme?)

i like the way mr. millan presents this in his book because he is not looking to "fix" anyone....bahaha...cracking myself up with my dog puns. anyway. he's not saying my life will suck if i can't master this calm assertive energy. he's just saying if i want to be the pack leader--and apparently my dogs NEED for me to be the pack leader--that i have to learn how to project this energy. and he says if i don't feel it...if i'm usually a much more emotional person (NOT that he was speaking to me PERSONALLY)....then i need to learn how to fake it. because my dog won't respect me if i can't project it. because agitated dominance and agitated submissive tell my dog that i'm an unstable pack leader. (holy shit, ain't that the truth? my kids could SO second that emotion....but i think they've learned to trust me...chuckle)

i plan to keep learning lots from this book. i tried to implement some of it while at the grocery store TWICE today. (no, i'm not a glutton for punishment...knowing my tendency to get totally overwhelmed these days, i figured i'd break it up into two trips today...one with just little bit to pick up the non-perishables and then the second with the whole crew to get the cold stuff...it worked out alright, i think) but being the tuesday before thanksgiving, the stores were a MAD HOUSE....don't people eat on other days besides thanksgiving? i mean, wtf? but EVERYONE shops for food the week before thanksgiving. because it's the one day of the year we ALL eat on.... and i was trying to project calm assertive energy toward all the other shoppers. but i don't think humans really are pack animals. i mean, mr. millan says we are, but they were not reading my energy at all. and when i read some of their energy, well, it was kind of weird. i mean, most of them seemed pretty tired, pretty overwhelmed, pretty unhappy. the grocery store is such a strange place. people don't often seem "plugged in" to what's going on around them. anyway, i could attempt to make a joke here....think of funny names for the different energies i read today...but i really think sometimes we need to tune into the humanity of those we're walking with, whether we chose to show up at the grocery at the same time they did or not. and i'm a little worn these days (what with all that frantic defending i've been doing in my head) and i probably wouldn't feel like someone i don't even know fucking with me. so i'm not going to fuck with anyone today... i figure we all have thanksgiving coming, and we're just looking to have a nice day with at least one or two opportunities to reflect on life and hug those we love and maybe those we don't see very often. so i wish that for all those folks who i shared space with today. that, and some calm assertive energy...
peace