what's my motivation again?...

i am tired. damn, i'm tired.

my knee is not cooperating with me this morning... think it KNOWS i'm going to try to run this half marathon in february? nah... but what the hell? driving? was it the twelve hours of driving (or more) that i did this week? was pushing the accelerator and brake THAT taxing? i don't know. it's just one of those things i'm too damned tired to deal with rationally. crying sounds good...

i am not in any way prepared for today. i have no lesson plans, although i suppose we can just start with wednesday of last week and do what didn't get done last week. i have no food. i need to make a grocery list. but thanksgiving is this week and my bil "assigned" everyone dishes to make. so i have to go buy specific food--like not just whatever is on sale. and he told me last night that the store was "already sold out of frozen cranberries" and, well, i just don't have the resources to deal with this! you mean to tell me we have to be on the ball for our thanksgiving shopping or else we can't cook thanksgiving?!?! oh for the love of god, i give up. i'll bring peanut butter and jelly for thanksgiving...sheesh... it just doesn't seem like giving thanks is something we should have to hurry up or lose out on...but maybe i'm just not in the right place this morning.

i am reading a new book. it is by the dog whisperer. and i think it is a great book. one of the really neat things about this book is that this man identifies the one universal language as energy. wow. never thought i'd find such a simple, yet completely integrated way of looking at energy in a book about dog psychology. but here it is and i really, really am liking reading it. (probably a small part of why i am so unprepared today..but it has been a long time since a book kept me away from my stuff) anyway...the man's name is cesar millan and he talks about the energy we project and how our dogs are always reading it. so he talks about harnessing it, focusing it. basically, he's promoting meditation and dogs as wonderful biofeedback machines. :) not really. but sort of. i mean, there's more about meeting the specific needs of dogs....but i really like a lot of what this book is saying. i am learning much.

ok, let me finish my coffee and find something to eat. i need to make a grocery list. i need to clip the plants N brought over that have been at a friend's house and are half dead...i will minister to those in a few. i need to run...or walk at least. my kids need to be taken to a park to run around or maybe just pull the bikes out in the cul de sac since they slept til nine. i have a little more laundry to fold. i need to clean the rabbit room and mow the grass one more time this season. i need to throw away my wallpaper pulling trash and put the table back against that wall. and i need to vacuum. oh, and mop the kitchen and clean the bathrooms. busy week.... hope my pack will cooperate....

peace