breathing and appreciating

house guest left today. he was not a bad person. a month was just a long time. it was a huge weight off when he left.

i cleaned today. i should probably smudge a little, too. i did not run and i ate n's leftover chicken fettuccine alfredo...doh.

N is on call today. he was already tired at 7pm. only thirteen more hours to go... it breaks my heart to see him so tired. it fills my heart that he's doing it. i think my heart gets worn out sometimes.

o scored his first goal this season today. he is not a goal scorer. he is a goal assistor. he was totally on the down low about the whole scoring thing. i, on the other hand, was almost strutting. it was exciting. but more so for me than him. i think he was thinking, "geez mom, i've had fun all season...why are you making such a big deal out of today?" he's so much more mature than i....

e is as stubborn as n. today n told e if he had a bad attitude, he wouldn't get any mac and cheese (that n was making). so e showed him...he didn't touch the mac and cheese. even after n almost begged him to eat it. (well, he took a tiny nibble when n wasn't watching)

i talked to my sister tonight. she constantly amazes me what a wonderful person she is. her ex-girlfriend won't do a long distance relationship. for the first time in my sister's life, she is committed to finishing school. i realize her ex is committed to remaining sober, and i respect that. so does my sister. but it's kind of sad that her ex can't respect that my sister's committed, too. a year later, things will be fine. but i think my sis's heart is already broken. but it's been broken a few times before, and they say breaks heal even stronger than before...so her heart is STRONG.....

n takes care of me. he gives me massages and makes me laugh. i am happy for him to get his room back.

s gives me hope in the world because he remains so positive about things...and he's so damned reasonable about it, too. he's an old soul....

o is like his dad, another sunshine. he lights up the world and people smile just because he's smiling.

e is a clever little elf. i hope he doesn't turn to the dark side on us all.... :)

peace to you, tonight, N. i hope it's an easy night...easy births, easy passages, easy labors...

i'm waiting for back to the future to end and then i need to feed my girls. then, i am GOING TO BED.... it's amazing how different the house feels with just my family in it...

peace