on my own

just for the day. last time i did this was right before i moved when a mama friend took my kids for the day so i could clean and pack my house. but this is much funner....just lots of laundry to be done. well, and i should clean some rabbit cages, too...blech

so other than laundry, i've listened to "into the west" off of the lotr soundtrack about fifty times without anyone complaining. and i danced my ass off to big audio dynamite and erasure. (i was in a hurry to put on something fast) much fun. i think my beastie boys cd is in my van which my spouse took to get fixed two and a half hours away (in our home town) with my four sons, sooooo...

my mom left the hospital today. she sounded much, much better. that alone is great. if they can actually figure out what landed her there...pretty much icing. i'm expecting "idiopathic" to be part of the diagnosis, to be honest...

i was thinking about blogging today...how funny it is. i love it because it's easier to type a journal entry than go find my journal and write. and frankly, it's much less likely my kids will read my blog than my journal. and while i'm not hiding who i am, i don't exactly think they're ready for the workings of my mind just yet. at least not so spelled out. well, that and the rawness of emotion. yeah, i'm kidding myself... anyway... i've read how some bloggers feel pressure to write good stuff. and while i feel it sometimes, i obviously don't let that get in the way of just getting something out because that's primarily what this blog is for me. and outlet. there are way too many things bumping around in my head and i have to let some of it out...get some order to it, even if it's just words, even if they're crappy. and while i've been so very overwhelmed lately, blogging still helps somewhat.

i don't know what other people look for in blogs, but i like the insightful days, the honest days, the days where there's anger or frustration or sadness or happiness or joy or, yes, even those of just blah. most of it i can relate to in some part of me. some days i envy, some days i have much sympathy for, some i rejoice or just laugh with...but almost all i can empathize with and help me get in touch with some part of myself without having to do that work for the day. it's like little tune ups. and for that i am so very grateful.

so keep blogging...i know i will. if i have a sucky day (or many sucky days in a row), forgive me. go read one of the mamas on my blog roll...they're good...all of them.

back to laundry and music...i also want to watch stardust again. watched it with my guys the other day, but they thought it was kind of syrupy. i could've done with more syrup and less manly stuff...but i guess it kept us all happy. maybe i'll just fast forward through the fighting parts...i don't know why i'm feeling so "girly" today...maybe the lack of testosterone in the house... it feels good, whatever it is. not something i think i could handle for more than a day, but good nonetheless.

peace

ok, quick video....annie singing her song. i love her. just a regular mama with a voice that could kill a whole army of orcs...this one's shorter than the one on the cd, but i loved watching her sing it. hope you do, too