long time, no reflection

and this is not necessarily a good thing, either...

there are so many times in the last month that i've thought to myself, "i need to sit down and write about this." but then something in me just decides not to do it. like knowing i need to start getting on the treadmill again, stop certain vices of mine, make better food choices, and then i just don't... i'm not sure if i'm sabatoging myself, but it's just getting kind of old.

so what's been going on? i don't even remember...and i don't know that i want to. my nephews came up for four nights, s got four stitches while golfing with one cousin, N's uncle ronnie died, we matched for a residency, mama willa died on the table while being spayed, e weaned because the eczema just got too bad on both nipples, we're preparing our house to be put on the market. i think that's about it. oh, and then there's this n's sexual identity development stuff that has absolutely been mindfucking me, but that's just not a place i want to dwell right now.

i guess you could say i've been pretty low lately. i've actually been thinking of it as the abyss.

that's about it for now...i don't think i can take much more reflection. haha

peace