Friday, June 20, 2008

slogging through a bit

first of all, i had a wonderful time last night. david sedaris is charming, and funny, and kind, and sweet, and very cute, and extremely sharp witted and clever...it was a lot of fun. he read a story from his new book. the new book is called when you are engulfed in flames and the story was called "of mice and men." it was typical david sedaris knock you over humor and look into your soul insight and i was even a little pleasantly surprised by the ending... i laughed so much and so did the mama i went with. we had a lot of fun together and all in all, it was a really, really good night. i wish i hadn't had a cold...it could've been that much better, but it was a good time.

this cold is wearing me down. i mean, i had so much fun last night, but when i got home, i was t.i.r.e.d. and my spouse...i mean, what is it? why does it work that he'll get so busy at work and then check in with us and he's like, "man, this place is a wreck, how do you live in it?..." and no, that's not really what he said. but traditionally, the reintroduction phase is rather coarse around here. what he did say was, "i'm just in a bad mood because we really need to pull our house and, well, our lives really, together." to which i wanted to respond, "and where the fuck did the rainbow go?!?!" but i wisely didn't....

yeah, our house is crazy. we are busy, growing, expanding horizons type folks. i have one of my best friend's deceased mama's things all over my house, awaiting the completion of packaging and mailing off to houses where these things will be as used and loved by women as creative and wonderful as the mama being honored. i have books all over the place waiting for curriculum to be pulled from and shared with children i've agreed to teach in this cooperative effort this fall coming up. i also have books everywhere supporting me in this spiritual shift i've been having while trying to maintain some sense of normalcy in the house, the kitchen, the laundry, the yard, the kids, the animals, whatnot... and i have failed in the laundry department as there are piles of it everywhere, threatening to suffocate small children should they stray too close. and i don't know when i'll get to them as i haven't made the laundry soap (that has to cure for twenty-four hours before being used) that these kids' sensitive skin requires yet. and we eat too much convenience food right now...too much cubed cheese and sandwiches and fruit and nuts and, well, ice cream can count as a meal, right? and let's not even talk about the lists i have detailing completion of organizing the cooperative efforts, completion of painting the house, reorganizing and planning a semester of schooling for the children i've birthed, all the mother's day/father's day/birthday/graduation day/confirmation day cards i've never mailed but am still determined to send I DON'T CARE how late they are, and the gardening i need to maintain as well as the seeds i still need to sow.

i know i don't need to take his statement personally. i KNOW i should just be glad to have someone to hand the freaking list to and help me work on it. and that is where i'm trying to dwell. well, there and on the couch...because i think i need a nap. i am wiped after the meeting we attended today. and i've almost got this cold kicked...thanks for the gesundheit, aimee.
peace

1 comment:

LanaTron said...

Oh, mama. You are doing the best you can, right? That's all you can do...

I think you need to put your hands in your pockets...sounds like he's trying to hand you some of his.

Love you!