just a small check list of sorts

--book club was fun. they really don't discuss the book much at all, which is kind of weird. but maybe if i actually read the book for next month, i'll have something to add, thereby increasing the discussion time from fifteen to at least seventeen minutes. we'll see. but we did discuss eddie izzard quite a bit, tell some stories, and laugh a lot. it's strange to be seated at a table with a group of women and hear them tell stories about each other's births, spouses, houses, families...it was so apparent how long they'd known each other. and me the outsider... but i mean strange in a neat way. i enjoyed it. i just wonder sometimes if we're really meant to settle here in this place of ultra-conservatism. i mean, these women did and they seem happy. i guess we'll just have to see....

--emily died. not emily saliers...emily, my mouse. it was sad. she ate some grapefruit seeds while she was out on saturday, and i haven't googled it, but that's all i can figure would've been bad. unless she ate my incense or something? i don't know. so amy is all alone. and i want to get her a friend, but i'm going to wait to be sure she's healthy for awhile before i start some chain of mouse deaths in my house...that would be so sad.

--my spouse woke me up at six o'clock this morning because he heard something in the wall. he was getting ready for work. he was all laughing/wow/freaking out about it. i was all grubby-eyed/drowsy/wtf? about it. and then he proceeded to leave a bunch of lights on in the house...as though five of us weren't still sleeping. i guess i should say seven because the dogs were asleep, too, and then miss kitty started whining to go outside and, oh, i was just annoyed. but i think he was all chipper cause, well, you know, he got some last night. and we've been talking a lot. and i think he's feeling good about things. and i am, too. nothing like being the total outsider to get you to make peace with those you're closest to. he even said he'd start doing yoga with me...and NOT make fun of us...yeah...i'll believe it when i see it.

--i've been thinking a lot about the mamas on my mama board...and just the circles of friends i have, in general. the diversity. the shared love and support. what's important to each individually. what becomes important as we journey as a group. i still have a lot to learn. but the shifts at this point seem to be coming below the verbal radar, which is important sometimes....saves it from potential mindfucking. must be sacred stuff... but i do love these women.

--it feels good to get stuff done around the house. actually getting a lot of this stuff out of the house is doing great things for my state of mind. i might post some pics later of the kids' closets...please don't think me crazy. but i want to preserve this moment...if i get around to it.

--and i think that's it for now. last rock climbing class is today. i am looking forward to a little more "unstructured" time. i have a post brewing about my second born son that i will try to get to this week. i have a couple of meetings this week, too. piano. no flute. i think i've got it under control...snort.

peace